Tuesday, September 22, 2009

POWERPUFF! (doo doo doo doo doooooo)

Dilatory- late, overdue, procrastinating, neglectful, etc.

The Walking Dictionary's Definition of the Day Award goes to: this blog post!

*nervous chuckle* Well, hi there, oh-so-wonderful readers! Ya' look a little...testy. Look, look, I know I've been gone a while, but no worries! I have a reasonable explanation...

Well, not really. I COULD tell you all sorts of things, like that I was too busy with homework or after-school activities, or that my computer accidentally fell in a lake, or maybe even that I got stepped on by an elephant recently and lost the ability to type. However, this is not the case. The case is, in fact, that I was extremely lazy and got caught up in trying to beat my high score on Solitaire ("the game for lonely people", as my sister calls it. Hmm...) which may or may not be a valid excuse. YOU would be tortured too, if your high score was 1199 and you kept scoring 1198 again and again and again...

But there are bigger things at stake here! I have allowed the little blurbs of random in your brain to crawl back into their corners, and your thoughts are slowly turning normal once again! Yes, your brain relies on ME to stay random! (No? Oh, let me have my dreams.) So I have come to rescue you from the overwhelming dreariness of normality. But what is the perfect cure? Let's follow my train of thought:


... WHAT? What did you just say? The Powerpuff Girls aren't superheros?! How dare you! I daresay they ARE superheros, and they're superb ones at that! Why, just listen to their theme song!

"Fighting crime,
Trying to save the world,
Here they come just in time,
The Powerpuff Girls!"

Now, unless they are a group of nerds playing Final Fantasy in their parent's basement, I would say that those words describe only SUPERHEROES! They fly! They punch! They use laser eyes and ice breath and can speak Spanish! (C'mon, you know it's a superpower.) What more do you want?

Oh. You want proof. You want PROOF. Well, I'll give you proof. I should KNOW about the PPGs because I have a box set of every episode known to man, not to mention all the commercials involving the girls, a documentary of how they came into being, and an extra, 10th anniversary episode in which Mojo Jojo sings "Everybody Wants to Rule the World" by Tears for Fears. And if you don't believe me, you can ask any of my friends (or yourselves, since most of you ARE my friends). So yeah. Get owned.

Yet still, you say the Powerpuff Girls aren't superheroes. WHY?


You have got to be kidding me. Because they're little girls?!?!?! B.....b....but c'mon!!!!!!! That doesn't mean a thing! When I was a little girl, I accomplished many things, such as watching Barney in the fireplace and coming out covered in soot. Ahem.... but I could have saved the world if I wanted to... and if I had had superpowers. But you see? The PPGs did have superpowers, and they did want to save the world! Therefore, they are superheroes. Case closed.

...Or not. They're too cute to be superheroes, you say? Hmmm... interesting. I thought about something like this the other day. You see, my English class just finished reading Lord of the Flies, a classic book that is pretty much about a bunch of boys who crash-landed on an island, turn savage, and start killing each other. Yaaaaay! But anyways, we had to do an oral commentary, where we were each given a question about the book and had to record ourselves talking about it for 4-6 minutes. My question was: Discuss the role of "games" in the book.

Well, of course what started off as a harmless little commentary turned into this spiel about how the human nature was forever doomed to revolve around violence, etc etc. Why? Because you're talking to rant-girl here, and that's what I do. Part of my spiel was about how the boys were dismissed as innocent because they were little and cute, when in reality, they were killing each other over pigs and a stupid conch shell. (Don't ask, those who haven't read it. Just don't.) So. You want to tell me again that the Powerpuff Girls can't be superheroes because they are too cute? Yeah. Didn't think so.

And now that my rant about that is over, I think I will post something that may help you appreciate the Powerpuff Girls a little more...


Hear that? Not just superpowers. ULTRA superpowers! WHAT NOW?

The Great Blogzini predicts: At 8 AM tomorrow, someone will poison your milk. DO NOT DRINK YOUR MILK. (Thank you, The Office.)

1 comment:

  1. I have that box set too! :D :D

    Powerpuff Girls=THE BESTEST EVA.